Oh and I just bite my cheek & imagine tucking & rolling out of the truck. Then running into the woods to some creepy looking cabin house in the middle of nowhere with some sweet old lady that bathes me in chocolate & feeds me cookies. And she owns unicorns & glittery pandas…good shit.

Car rides with my dad & his idiotic wife are so awkward so I just look out the window…or the seats or my feet…trees, lots of trees. Or my water…that paper doe….and behind me or at my seat belt and sometimes my boobs…or my knees or how ugly the back of my dad’s head is. Or how big my step mom’s head is….or just the window. Yeah, windows.

Aaandd I’m single, once again. Lovely.

It’s my fault that I can’t get my permit, my fault that I can’t get a job, right? It’s all my fault, so just push everything on my shoulders like usual & not be a father like usual. What’s fucking new with you? Blaming me for something that isn’t in my position to have control over. I would love my permit but I’m unable to get it since my mom won’t let me. You think I like not being able to drive? You think I can stand here and feel like hot shit while you degrade me and push me over? What kind of father do you think you are doing this to me, we all know my driving is a subject I don’t like talking to you about because you blow it out of proportion. You want me to drive, talk to my mom. Or atleast talk to me in a nicer tone, so I don’t have to force myself to hold my tongue & walk off. Be a father for once, and respect my feelings & privacy. What if I didn’t want to drive? Would you not call me your daughter anymore? Oh wait, you already act like I’m not your daughter. Might as well make it legal. 

I forgot how much hate I had towards you.